Divorce, Remarriage and Church Leadership Roles

Recently I was asked a question via e-mail regarding the marriage of a man, who had never been married, to a woman that had been divorced. The question centered on whether or not that man was eligible to be a candidate to serve as a deacon in a local congregation even if the woman’s divorce had been for the only scripturally allowable reason. I tried to answer the question in the following manner…

 

If a person divorces their spouse for the only reason allowable by God then that person can re-marry. The only reason God allows for divorce under the New Testament is fornication (Matt. 5:32; 19:9). The word fornication comes from a Greek word which is transliterated “porneia.” This word is where our modern English word pornography comes from (“-graphy” meaning written or printed). The word porneia covers a multitude of sexual sins committed within, or even outside of, the bonds of marriage. Thayer’s dictionary of Greek terms defines it in the following manner…

 

   Thayer Definition:

1) illicit sexual intercourse

1a) adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc.

1b) sexual intercourse with close relatives; Lev. 18

1c) sexual intercourse with a divorced man or woman; Mark 10:11, Mark 10:12

2) metaphorically the worship of idols

2a) of the defilement of idolatry, as incurred by eating the sacrifices offered to idols

 

Now, the definition listed above as “1c” is where many draw a conclusion for application to the situation you have described. However, that application would be in conflict with what Jesus is recorded as saying in Matt. 5:32 and 19:9. Context is important here.

 

Remember that Jesus is addressing the Law of Moses and what God allowed regarding divorce under that system (look at Mark 10:2-5). Therefore the application of Jesus’ words here, as recorded by Mark, implies that he is answering the Pharisee’s question as a matter of governance according to the Old Law. Again if that were not so then it would contradict the implications of the comments of our Lord in Matthew’s record.

 

In light of these things I would contend that a man which marries a woman who was divorced from her previous husband for the scriptural reason, as stated in Matt. 5:32 and Matt. 19:9 has a legitimate and scripturally sound right to enter into that marriage.

 

Now, if that man wants to serve as a deacon in the church there is no absolute scriptural reason to deny him that privilege. Yet, if it causes strife, discord, and division among the other members there is a scripturally binding reason that he should not seek to fill the position. Paul says, 

 

“All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not.” (1Cor. 10:23; cf. 6:12) 

 

And from this we can draw a valid principle for application here. Paul is talking about the eating of meat offered to idols and how that might cause some discord or doubt among the newly converted pagans. But the principle is applied in this way, while it may be totally OK to do something according to God’s allowances, doing it could violate God’s commands to maintain harmony within the church. Note how Paul finishes the comments in that chapter.

 

“Give none offense, neither to the Jews, nor to the Gentiles, nor to the church of God: Even as I please all men in all things, not seeking mine own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved.” (1Cor. 10:32-33) 

 

You could also compare this (cf.) to what Paul says in Romans 14:13-23, which covers basically the same principle that Paul is addressing in those afore mentioned passages from 1 Corinthians.

 

So, I would say that there is no absolute scriptural reason this man should not be allowed to serve as a deacon, but if it is going to cause problems within the church he should act as a faithful Christian and withdraw his name from consideration. The whole church must be in harmony and the whole church must act according to God’s Word.

 

Those who misunderstand or misuse scriptures for envy, spite, self servience, or any other reason will answer someday to God in the final judgment. I would also let this probable deacon know that I would not get angry at those who are unlearned or lack the spiritual maturity to see these things. Paul didn’t and more importantly Jesus did not either. In fact He prayed for those who killed Him.

 

“Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34a

 




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