Building a God-Centered Home - Lesson 3

Start With Yourself
  

I.        INTRODUCTION

A.      Joshua made a commitment to God when he said, “As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD” (Josh. 24:15).

                                                             1.      This statement was made near the end of Joshua’s life when he called upon the children of Israel to decide whom they would serve – Jehovah or the false gods of their forefathers.

                                                             2.      Joshua had been a great leader of the people when Israel took the land, and he set forth his own decision to serve God as an example for Israel to follow now that they lived in the land.

B.      This statement by Joshua would have been meaningless had not Joshua been faithful to God himself.

                                                             1.      If Joshua had been a worshipper of idols, his claim to serve God would have been hollow, and the people of Israel would not have been inclined to commit themselves fully to God.

                                                             2.      Moreover, Joshua’s household would have been unlikely to serve God if he had exempted himself from God’s service and said, “As for my house, they will serve the LORD.”

C.      Therefore, as we continue this series, let each person understand that “Building a God-Centered Home” begins with devoting himself or herself to the service of God.

                                                             1.      In this lesson, we will consider some steps that each individual in the home should take to make the home a God-centered home.

                                                             2.      This lesson will serve as a foundation for other lessons to follow which will examine more specific applications for individuals in the home.

 

II.      STEP 1 – COMMIT YOURSELF TO GOD THROUGH CHRIST

A.      For one who desires a God-centered home life, he must begin by committing himself to God through faithful obedience to the gospel of Christ.

                                                             1.      Our first responsibility in the home, in the church, or in the world is to be faithful ourselves.  We cannot begin to affect others until we have accounted for our own souls (Matt. 7:3-5).

                                                             2.      Therefore, each person must believe and obey the gospel (1Cor. 15:1-4; Mark 16:15-16; Acts 2:38) and continue in the faith throughout life (Col. 1:23; Phil. 2:12; 2Pet. 3:18).

B.      This step may seem obvious, but it cannot be taken for granted.

                                                             1.      Some authorities in the home take the attitude of “do as I say, not as I do,” and thereby believe that their homes can serve God without them taking a part or leading in the way their homes should go.

                                                             2.      Some believe that they can simply “ride the coattails” of others in the home who are faithful without actively and sincerely seeking the Lord themselves.

                                                             3.      Some love the idea and the appearance of a God-centered home, but they do not love God enough to commit themselves to Him.  As the Lord said, “They have their reward in full” (Matt. 6:5).

                                                             4.      None of these attitudes leads to a truly God-centered home, but rather they are more likely to prevent a home from serving God.  Therefore, becoming a God-centered individual is the first step to a God-centered home.

 

III.   STEP 2 – LOVE ONE ANOTHER

A.      For a home to be God-centered, love must also be at its center.

                                                             1.      To be God-centered is to be love-centered.  Notice 1John 4:8 – “The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love.”

                                                             2.      A home where there is no love and none of the goodness that comes from love (patience, kindness, humility, optimism, joy, endurance, etc. – see 1Corinthians 13) cannot be centered upon God.

B.      The love of a God-centered home is like the love of Christ.

                                                             1.      Christ has shown us that love is as love does.  John wrote, “We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us” (1John 3:16).  If we have learned love in this way, then we must also practice it.

                                                             2.      Therefore, the members of a God-centered home are to be thoughtful of one another, regarding the others as more important than themselves, and sacrificing for one another (see Phil. 2:1-8).

C.      If we truly desire to love the people in our homes (including ourselves), then we must love God even more than we love them.

                                                             1.      The Lord said, “If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple” (Luke 14:26).

a.       “Hate” in this verse is a comparative term.  Here it means “to love less.”

b.       Therefore, the meaning of this verse is that Christ must be our first love.  The love we have for our own families and ourselves must pale by comparison to our love for Christ.

                                                             2.      The irony of this is that while we must love Christ more than we love the people in our homes, we will love the people in our homes more because we love Christ.

a.       True love toward one another stems from our love of God.  The more we love God, then the more we love one another.

b.       Borrowing and rewording a line from an old poem, one might say, “Yet this inconstancy is such as you too shall adore; I could not love thee so much, loved I not God more.”

 

IV.    STEP 3 – UNDERSTAND YOUR ROLE IN THE HOME

A.      It is necessary for each person in a home to understand his or her authority, responsibilities, influence, and limitations.

                                                             1.      Each person in the home needs to understand if he is a leader, a follower, a teacher, a learner, a provider, a steward, or any other role that is relevant in the home.

                                                             2.      Without this understanding, a person may fail to fulfill his or her role, or a person may overreach his or her boundaries.  At any rate, a home will fail to operate as God intended if the home’s members do not know their responsibilities.

                                                             3.      This understanding comes through the word of God.  As noted in the previous lesson, a home is built by wisdom, understanding, and knowledge from God (Prov. 24:3-4).

B.      In the next lessons, we will expand this subject and examine some specific roles in the home in detail.

 

V.      STEP 4 – USE YOUR INFLUENCE FOR GOOD

A.      Regardless of position, each person in a home has an amount of influence over the other persons living in the home.

                                                             1.      Persons in authority have an obvious advantage, for they may set the course for the home and determine exactly what will be permitted and what will be denied.

                                                             2.      However, persons in subjection also have influence in the examples they give to the others through words and deeds.

B.      The influence that a godly person has in the home must be used to promote the cause of Christ.

                                                             1.      In a home of believers, one’s influence should be used to strengthen the common faith of all while also discouraging anything that may draw anyone away from Christ.

                                                             2.      In a home where some believe and some do not, a Christian should make the most of opportunities to lead the others to the Lord.

a.       A person in authority (father, husband, etc.) in the home should set service to God as the home’s first priority and lead those in the home to conform to that goal.

b.       Believing persons in subjection (wives, children, etc.) should present examples of faith, love, obedience, submission, and other godly qualities through words and deeds so that the unbelievers might be persuaded to turn to God.  Consider Matthew 5:16; 1Corinthians 7:10-16; Colossians 3:23-24; 1Peter 2:12; 3:1-2; 4:14-16.

c.        In any case, Christians should pray for the unbelievers in their homes, for this is the greatest influence that Christians have for anyone (Jas. 5:16).

d.       Keep in mind that no one can force anyone else to believe in Christ.  The Lord knows this personally, for even His own brothers did not believe in Him (John 7:5).

 

VI.    STEP 5 – GROW

A.      A God-centered home will grow as individual Christians must grow within the home.

                                                             1.      Christians are not born again as fully mature and understanding children of God, and neither are God-centered homes begun with perfect maturity and understanding.

                                                             2.      Therefore, a God-centered home should grow as its members grow in the faith.  This will happen with steady and careful application of God’s wisdom in the home.

B.      Part of the growth of a God-centered home is adjusting to the changes in the home.

                                                             1.      A God-centered home may see tremendous changes over the course of its existence.  All members of the home grow older, children grow up and move away, and some members of the home die.  Each individual must understand when his role has changed so that he or she may fulfill it.

                                                             2.      Therefore, let each person in the home be prepared to build, learn, adjust, and change in the home as necessary to keep the home centered on God in every situation.